My friends Hakeem and Chamique both work at the United Nations (not as diplomats). They said I could come to the UN and look around and have lunch at the cafeteria. If you have never been to the UN, it is like being in Terminal 3 of Heathrow airport, but more farcical and without a Pret a Manger. If you have never been to Terminal 3 of Heathrow airport – picture every ethnic stereotype you can imagine sitting around a Pret a Manger: Africans wearing traditional dashikis mingling with Russian generals (who aren’t generals anymore, but still wear the uniform heavily decorated with medals related to one ethnic purging or another) who in turn are getting directions from Sikhs, who are yelling at Mexicans to clean the bathroom.

This ethnic melting pot is set along a backdrop of a building built in the 50’s (and obviously not updated since then). One thing I really love about New York is going into buildings that have not been renovated in 30-40 years (such as the UN). Walking through these hallways, I feel like I am part of a racist 70’s BBC sitcom (such as “Mind Your Language”). I was fortunate to run into current Secretary General Bang-Kyi-Moon while walking with Hakeem and Chamique to the cafeteria (another brush with greatness?).

This may be the point of the Cheesesandwich.org blog where we may cross the line. You’re probably wondering “Hey Cheese Sandwich guy! I can’t go to the UN cafeteria unless I know someone who works at the UN! Why are you reviewing it?” Well, apparently Mr. Zagat has rated the UN cafeteria, as has Yelp! (also some Yelpers have reviewed the UN, which seems strange to me), and if those slumlords of restaurant critique can review the UN lunchroom, then why can’t I? Apparently, anyone can actually eat here, as long as you make reservations 24 hours in advance (the dining hall, not the cafeteria). I was fortunate to eat at the cafeteria frequented by mid-level bureaucrats, not bloated diplomats, which was a great experience. The dining experience is comparable to that of a quality hospital, but the most enjoyable experience is the view of the East River.

There are a few options for vegetarians at the Cafeteria – you can make your own cheese sandwich or have a veggie burger, but I decided to go with the rice and beans (you may be aware of my stance on rice and beans) and the ratatouille with lemon broccoli and the sugar snap peas (and a side of onion rings). While looking at the food, which was found in heating troughs, I couldn’t help but be disappointed. However, I was thoroughly surprised when eating the food. The vegetables in the ratatouille were crisp and fresh, as were the broccoli and peas. They looked like they had been sitting out a while (we were eating well after the lunch rush), so this was amazing. Also, the black beans and Mexirice (yes, that’s the name) was quite tasty.

Finally, when I tried the onion rings, I expected them to be oily and soggy, but they were actually quite light and crispy (even my dining snob friend Hakeem thought they were good). There is a limited selection, and the food appears disappointing, but when it really matters, the food is just what you need to get you through the day. It’s sort of like how on the surface, the UN looks useless and flimsy, but when given a chance, it’ll impress you once in a while (as long as you don’t get Chinese involved).  I give the UN cafeteria three and half cheese sandwiches.

United Nations
1st Avenue & E 46th St
Manhattan, New York, NY 10017